Flirting in Latin
by MGD
Summary: Fun Twist on Latin Lessons


This story is dedicated to GeekyBMWWFan. In e_Stranger in Paradise, she uses the Aeneid in a chapter. That chapter gave birth to this idea. _

It is a bit different and definitely experimental for me. Let's just say that the story isn't like anything I've written. I hope that some people like it. Enjoy. The latin peices are translated at the bottom of the story.

**Flirting in Latin**

It was a rare team-up on the schedule today. Usually, one of the founding members was placed in charge of missions. Yet, today three of the founders could be found in the research center of the Metro-Tower. Batman sat in the corner station typing away feverishly as he worked on something mysterious. On the other side, Woman Wonder sat at another console chair with her legs crossed. In her hands, she held a piece of literature that seemed almost archaic compared to the supercomputers filling every spare space of the Tower. Flash had his legs propped up on the console. In his left hand, he held his trusty triple mocha latte, and his right hand was manning the emergency alerts popping up on the screen. The Watchtower had directed teams to cover all the current emergencies, so the team in the Metro-Tower could actually relax.

Flash listened as Diana read aloud. He couldn't understand the words that she said since the text was written in some strange foreign language. It was enough to listen to her voice. She spoke in a rich and deep tone that surrounded the room with a soothing calm, and each sentence was spoken in a melodic ancient rhythm. Closing his eyes, Flash tried to slow his heart rate to match the beat set by her voice. Unfortunately, superhuman metabolism doesn't came with slow steady heartbeats. Keeping his eyes closed, he switched from concentrating on the internal to the external sounds in the room.

He was shocked. _Could Bats actually be listening?_ He refocused on the rhythm of her voice and the velocity of his keystokes. They were in perfect sync. Bats was typing to the beat of the Princess. Flash smirked to himself keen on his own little discovery. Then, he drifted away again into the calm.

"Referentibus iam pedem ab ea parte Romanis, M. Valerius Publicolae frater, conspicatus ferocem iuuenem Traquinium ostentantem se in prima exsulum acie, domestica etiam gloria accensus ut cuius familiae decus eiecti reges erant, eiusdum interfecti forent, subdit calcaria equo et Tarquinium infesto spiculo petit. Tarquinius retro in agmen suorum infenso cessit hosti: Valerium temere inuectum in exsulum aciem ex transuero quidam adortus transfigit, nec quicquam equities ulonere equo retardato, moribundus Romanus labentibus super corpus armis ad terram defluxit,"[1] Diana concluded. She marked her place in the text before laying the book on the console.

Flash whirled his chair around to see why she stopped. After taking a moment to enjoy the elegant movements of her body as she stretched, he commented, "That was beautiful, Di. Very entertaining."

"Really?" Diana asked in surprise taking in his easygoing grin.

"Absolutely. No one sounds as good as you," Flash added with a toothy smile.

"I thought his actions were irrational and foolhearty. Any Amazon would be thrown in the barracks for such impertinence except maybe Artemis. She always cut down all the warriors around her before anyone can catch up," Diana responded.

"That's nice," Flash replied while his smile began to wane.

"He meant your voice, Princess. Though, he might find something familiar in Valerius's approach," Batman interrupted their exchange as he moved to work at the console next to Flash.

"Oh! Thank you, Wally, " Diana chose to acknowledge Batman's first comment and ignored his second.

"Who's approach?" Flash unknowingly walked into the criticism.

"The last passage described a man, Valerius, who sped into battle to defend this brother's honor," Diana explained.

"Oh!" Flash responded sounding pleased.

"He took off from his fellow soldiers to kill the adversary commander. The enemy soldiers surrounded the prince to protect him. Valerius got a spear to the gut for his efforts," Batman finished the story.

"Oh," Flash replied with a grimace.

"The point is to not seek vengence," Diana scowled at Batman, "His personal aggression cost him his life, and the army lost a soldier."

"Why would you read somethinglike that?" Flash frowned after hearing the content of the story.

"It was recommended to me," Diana used her eyes to point out Batman as the recommender, "I need to practice my Latin, and Livy wrote a good overall history of Rome."

"Doesn't sound very excited?" Flash sneered at the book sitting on the console.

"It can be dry in places," Diana admitted.

"Didn't some old guys translate this stuff into English? Why does anyone have to learn this stuff anymore?" he asked causing Batman to shake his head imperceptibly and to sigh softly. To him, the reason could not be more obvious.

Diana suppressed a laugh as she noticed his actions. Flash seemed to be oblivious to the grumpy Bat behind him. After shooting a glare at Batman, Diana tried to explain, "Not everything written in Latin has been translated. A lot of magic spells are in Latin. It is good to have this knowledge if the team ever faces someone who uses those spells."

"Oh," he thought for a moment. "Maybe I should learn it; it could help if we need something translated in a pinch," Flash said thoughtfully surprising Diana and Batman, "Would you help me, Diana?"

"I would be honored, Wally. It's a wonderful idea. Right, Bruce?" she responded smiling at Wally and scrutnizing Bruce.

"It could prove useful," he answered in an even tone.

"We have to find something better to read. That Livit guy is …creepy," Flash grinning over his good idea.

"Any suggestions?" Diana asked haughtily looking at Bruce.

"You should start with the basic Latin scripts that you used," he replied refocusing on the computer screen.

"And after that? Remember Wally can read at superspeed," she countered.

"Yeah, I read pretty fast. I get through the entire comic shop in under five minutes every Wednesday," Wally supported her point.

"Can you retain it?" he challenged.

Flash enthusiastically began, "I could tell you all about the adventures of Rocket Buster Boy and his sidekick…"

Batman cut him off, "Try Ovid."

"Care to elaborate a little more," Diana requested crossing her arms over her chest.

Batman huffed in frustration. After a moment of silence, he complied, "His most popular work is _Metamorposes_. It recounts the legends of your gods and goddesses."

"Why would I read about something that I already know?" Diana challenged.

"Yeah. Why she should she read stuff she already knows?" Flash parroted.

Batman silenced him with a frightening glare before continuing, "One story is about a man named Pygmalion that sculpts the most beautiful woman he can imagine in clay. After falling in love with the scuplture, he beseeches Aphrodite to turn it into flesh. His request is granted as he lays his hands on the clay. The goddess blesses their union and marriage."

"I like that story," Diana said as her face and voice softened.

"I thought you would," he replied without the growl in his voice.

Flash studied the reactions of the pair as his face contorted as if he was deep in thought. Suddenly, the computers lit up with a red alert. He whirled around in his chair processing the emergency. A few seconds later, he reported, "Bank robbery at First National Bank in Keystone City. Authorities have been alerted."

"Go," Batman ordered taking over monitor duty.

"You sure?" Flash asked shocked. One look at Bats had him flying out the door.

"Bank robbery in Keystone? That was convenient," Diana questioned the timing.

"The tower is hooked into all emergency frequencies," Batman spoke matter-of-factly.

"True but usually the lower priority alerts are handled by local police or fire departments," Diana arched her left eyebrow.

"Just lucky timing I guess," Batman gave her a Bruce Wayne smirk, "This does give us a moment to talk about your private tutoring sessions. We could move onto Ovid if you like. He wrote another book you might like."

"What is this one called?" she smiled, too.

"_Ars Amatoria_," he leaned in closer.

"What is it about?" she queried locking with his gaze.

"I have a better idea," he caressed her gauntlet with his gloved hand, "I can recite a passage."

He moved in closer to whisper, "Conscius, ecce, duos accepit lectus amantes: Ad thalami clausas, Musa, resiste fores. Sponte sua sine te celeberrima verba loquentur, Nec manus in lecto laeva iacebit iners. Invenient digiti, quod agant in partibus illis, In quibus occulte spicula tingit Amor. Fecit in Andromache prius hoc fortissimus Hector, Nec solum bellis utilis ille fuit. Fecit et in capta Lyrneside magnus Achilles, Cum premeret mollem lassus ab hoste torum. Illis te manibus tangi, Brisei, sinebas, Imbutae Phrygia quae nece semper erant. An fuit hoc ipsum, quod te, lasciva, iuvaret, ad tua victrices membra venire manus? Crede mihi, non est veneris properanda voluptas, sed sensim tarda prolicienda mora. Cum loca reppereris, quae tangi femina gaudet, non obstet, tangas quo minus illa, pudor. Aspicies oculos tremulo fulgore micantes, ut sol a liquida saepe refulget aqua. Accedent questus, accedet amabile murmur, et dulces gemitus aptaque verba ioco. Sed neque tu dominam velis maioribus usus desere, nec cursus anteat illa tuos; ad metam properate simul: tum plena voluptas, cum pariter victi femina virque iacent. Hic tibi versandus tenor est, cum libera dantur Otia, furtivum nec timor urget opus. Cum mora non tuta est, totis incumbere remis utile, et admisso subdere calcar equo."[2] His smirk grew more lopsided as her cheeks grew redder.

[1] Titus Livius, _The Early History of Rom_e, Book 2.20

_It was not long before the Romans in that sector began to give away; it was a critical moment, and M. Valerius, Publicola's brother, was killed in a gallant attempt to retrieve the situation: the sight of young Tarquin on his horse, in the front rank of exiles, insolently, as it seemed, inviting attack, set him on fire, and resolving that the family of the Valerii should have the glory not only of the expulsion of the Tarquins but also of their death, he set spurs to his horse and made for the young prince, to run him through the body. Tarquin moved back as he saw him coming; his troopers rallied closely round him, and one of them, stepping aside as Valerius swept past at a mad gallop, thrust his spear through his body. Valerius fell dying to the ground, his shield and spear on top of him, while the riderless horse galloped on._

[2] Ovid, _Ars Amatoria_, Book II Lines 703-732

_See, the knowing bed receives two lovers: halt, Muse, at the closed doors of the room. Flowing words will be said, by themselves, without you: and that left hand won't lie idle on the bed. Fingers will find what will arouse those parts, where love's dart is dipped in secrecy. Hector did it once with vigor, for Andromache, and wasn't only useful in the wars. And great Achilles did it for his captive maid, when he lay in his sweet bed, weary from the fight. You let yourself be touched by hands, Briseis, that were still dyed with Trojan blood. And was that what overjoyed you, lascivious girl, those conquering fingers approaching your body? Trust me, love's pleasure's not to be hurried, but to be felt enticingly with lingering delays. When you've reached the place, where a girl loves to be touched, don't let modesty prevent you touching her. You'll see her eyes flickering with tremulous brightness, as sunlight often flashes from running water. Moans and loving murmurs will arise, and sweet sighs, and playful and fitting words. But don't desert your mistress by cramming on more sail, or let her overtake you in your race: hasten to the goal together: that's the fullness of pleasure, when man and woman lie there equally spent. This is the pace you should indulge in, when you're given time for leisure, and fear does not urge on the secret work. When delay's not safe, lean usefully on the oar, and plunge your spur into the galloping horse. While strength and years allow, sustain the work: bent age comes soon enough on silent feet. Plough the earth with the blade, the sea with oars, take a cruel weapon in your warring hands, or spend your body, and strength, and time, on girls: this is warlike service too, this too earns plenty._


End file.
